The urban dictionary defines a baby mama as a woman or lady who chooses to have a child by a man who she isn't married to. I use the word "choose" because it is a choice, you either want to keep it or you don't.
Now, I remember back in the day, having a child out of wedlock was a huge taboo. I especially wasn't a fan of how the ladies were treated as they were made to feel inferior. Fast forward to 2015 and being a baby mama is now a glorified status. Women now use their children as meal tickets.
I can't comprehend all this bullshit. Nobody is saying the other person should not have sex. I am all for sexual liberation. I believe as a woman I can be a sexual being too. I don't believe in body counts because I think it is the men's way of making the woman feel caged in her own self. I mean, what if I have slept with 13 men? What if I tried to build a meaningful relationship with each man but it all failed. Are you now telling me that I am now trash for refusing to give up on finding true love? Wow, I am heated up already because I am so passionate about this topic. Back to the topic at hand, we all have sex. We all have primary information on how pregnancy occurs. How then can someone in this 21st century be having an unplanned pregnancy? I understand that not every pregnancy prevention method is 100% but still how often do we prepare ourselves?
He's rich. He's handsome. He's sexy. Next thing, you jump into the sack. You are going to have sex but you have no condom but you trust your self to pull out at the perfect moment forgetting that some girls can get pregnant from pre cum. How stupid are you? Next she says he took advantage of her.
The dude knows he is not prepared to have sex because no protection but as a sharp guy you cannot turn down fresh pussy. Lol. 2 months later you are bickering and threatening the girl not to keep the baby and when she finally does you call her a slut and say she's been around until DNA test proves otherwise. Excuse me? Who you help? How is it my business when you carry your baby mama talk to my side? Looking for sympathy? Look elsewhere.
Unplanned pregnancy is the fault of the two people involved. One could not say no and the other could not exercise self control. It would have been better if another innocent life was not involved but it gets messier when the man isn't willing to marry the lady. These days things are so messed up that we have baby mamas everywhere. It started from the USA and now in Nigeria only a handful of artistes don't have baby mamas. There's almost an unspoken competition. It seems like we girls now think having a child for a rich man is our passport to a better life. We are hoping that our stories end like Annie's. It is completely absurd.
Early this morning I watched the David drama unfold and I have decided to sit on the fence for the time being afterall, I did not help them hold torchlight. Lol.
I am not ready for a child now. I can't lose this hot body of mine. I am not ready to have a child by a person who I might come to hate. How do I completely love this child? I am not ready to compromise. I am not ready to stop chasing my dreams for a child. Long story short, I am not prepared to have a baby. How do I plan to not get pregnant? When I finally decide to date someone we have to have the what-are-we and where-are-we-headed conversation. Next we get tested for HIV and compatibility. Then we together choose a reliable family planning method. Yes, family planning, girls are not smiling.
My advice is for us to be true to ourselves and to love ourselves enough to want the best. If he don't have any protection, he should not be trying to initiate sex. If you like it skin to skin then be sure to take contraceptives before engaging. If you are male, be concerned, after sex drive her to a pharmacy and get her appropriate medication. Please don't take home made contraceptives as those have gotten so many women killed. As always, the best way is to abstain. Sex is not for the weak minded my dear.
If you are already a baby mama and this post comes off as a bit offensive please know that I can almost understand your feelings and what you are going through but this post is for all them young girls getting with them celebrities and them girls who don't have anyone to really spell things out to them. Look, you will hear it big time. Its not going to be a walk in the park. Listen up! This post is also for them boys to shine their eyes. That said, I will still revisit the Davido drama when we get more rounded information, right now we are just watching them throw shots via social media. Where my pop corn at?
Later rebels,
Xoxo, The Lagos Rebel 😍
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