Don't let anyone treat you like you're silver You are GOLD.

Hey guys, how you doing?

LOL, I bet you all have given up on me.

I did get all your encouraging emails to continue writing but I failed. I failed this blog. I failed myself. Once upon a time my blog was the only beautiful thing about my life and then I got a job and expectations started to rise and so much pressure started arising and then I lost my will to write.

I apologise.

I sincerely apologise.

Y’all were rooting for me in your own little way and I failed you.

I do hope you guys get to read this piece though.

Straight to the topic that finally got me writing again. Today I am going to be talking about value systems and how it is important to always always know your worth and not compromise on the quality that you associate yourself with.

Recently, I met this random person. We are going to call him Mr X. We got talking via social media and finally, I decided to meet with him. You know, take this conversation to the real world. Turns out he is a really cool dude and all. He's well spoken, well put together and just my exact spec (FYI, I don't judge people based on their physical attributes. I judge them based on the strength of their character).

Thing is, after my last relationship that didn't quite work out, I gave up on men and love. They don't deserve me (insert a straight face smiley here please). For real though. I just felt like it wouldn't hurt to get the minutest form of attention from a man, now would it?

After seeing him four different times, I noticed two distinct things. The quality of date venues he took me to kept declining. Also, the amount of money he gives me for transportation also kept declining. My take on this is that, the more he saw me, I mean the more I made myself readily available, the more he slipped. Like he must be thinking "She's not all that, why put in so much effort to impress her?"

For me, way I value people/ relationships is that I won't create time for you if you are not contributing to my life positively. Likewise, the more I see someone, the more I tend to give to the person. Yes, I am a loner but if I choose to spend time with you then it is because I value you and see something in you (this is not even love related. Chill).

Now, It is not the money he gives me that is the main issue (it is an issue nonetheless), it is how comfortable he seems to be. Thing is, it is not easy trying to restructure a person's mindset on what his value system should look like. It is a learned behaviour that takes a lot to alter. That is the reason why I decided to write this piece.

Look, I rate myself. I am not beautiful. I am not robustly endowed but I am not ordinary. I am not basic. I am smart, I am goodlooking, I am sound, I am entertaining. I am not silver. I am not an economy ticket. I am fucking GOLD. G-O-L-D! Now, it would have been easy for me to say "Oh, I enjoy his company and I will see how this pans out". Guess what? I am not settling. I will not say because the only serious man I currently like resides in Abuja and is not readily available to me I will continue with this dude. Lol. I know my value and it surely doesn't match his value proposition so I am moving on.

My story might not be entirely similar to yours but I am hoping you get the drift. Queen, don't settle. Don't plead the case of the half bread. Stick to your value. Be true to yourself. Don't let anybody price your market. Your market value should always be on the rise. Keep bettering yourself. Keep working on yourself. Keep pushing the limits of what is obtainable.

Dear Queen, you are not ordinary. Your scars make you even more beautiful. You are no silver. You are pure gold. Thing is, I can't brainwash you to believe this. I can only hope that one day you get to that point in your life where you realise that going after temporal happiness will never fulfil you and the way other people treat you is dependent on how you treat yourself.

And that is it!

XOXO,

The lagos rebel.

The Friday Everything Changed... 12/2/2016

Last Friday was definitely one to remember. I had gone out to source content for my blog and I had an amazing time.

1.       I went to the Rele Art gallery.

2.       I got bounced at The Long Bar simply because I am a lady and I was going in alone (that is a story for another day.)

3.       On coming out of the long bar, I met with Jyd (Jide) of the bond band. Now, this is a new band and they were going to perform at hotel bon voyage and because of how instantaneous I am, I went along with them to the pool section of the hotel where they were set to perform live. The band is made of about 6 men and a lady. I had granted them an interview and promised them a feature on my blog and was really looking forward to doing so. Continue for more:

New year motivation: Count Not Your Losses, Stay Thankful!

I always love to start the year on a clean slate so as soon as I got back from my home town, I decided to run a few tests at a hospital. I tested positive to typhoid and negative to malaria so I started treatment. During the course of treating my self I started having a major reaction to something and I started having tiny boil- like stuffs all around my arms, back, neck, laps and stomach. I felt horrible because my skin is my pride. I have soft, dark and almost spotless skin. Now imagine how sad I must feel. Plus I had made plans to go out more this year.

WHY ARE YOU DATING HIM? For the title or for his personality?

It's year 2016, it's a fresh year. What better time to tell some truths than now? We are stuck in an era where we feel the need to show off and let strangers in on how and why we take certain decisions. We want to seem loved, we want to seem fashionable, we want to seem friendly when in reality the only place where we have friends is on social media. A lot of times we jump on bandwagons just so as not to be the odd one out. Whatever happened to wanting to be different and embracing who you are? You want a tattoo simply because it's the in- thing not because there is a story you wish to tell. You want breast implants because Chelsea just got her some not because your breasts have been a dire insecurity of yours that has always made you feel small. You just don't want to carry last in this life. What a sad way to live.

Living with your insecurities

Every day is a reason to be happy. Right! Easier said.
I hope that this post touches somebody the positive way. I have always been insecure. I have always felt not good enough and this didn't help the choices I made.

I am dark skin with a long neck and toothpick legs. I obsessed over these features. I will always think about bleaching my skin. I will always worry about what people thought about my legs. This continued all through my secondary school days. Then, university happened. In university, alot of boys felt I was sexy. My dark skin wasn't a taboo anymore. my neck was graceful and my legs were not so bad after all.  I felt better about myself.

Today, I have greater insecurities because at 23, I am single and suffering from a terrible acne situation which started early this year. I have been celibate for almost two years now preparing for the right person. Thing is, the class of men I desire don't date broke girls like me who have no achievements. How do you think I feel? I have tried everything I can afford to get rid of these pimples all to no avail. I have been searching frantically for a job but nothing has worked.

I don't know what you are going through. A lot of my friends insist that my acne should not be considered a problem but I beg to differ. Are you depressed? Is there anything in particular that makes you feel less than what you are? Do you have something planted at the back of your mind that continually drags you down? I think I know what we should do.

We can live with this insecurities. We can try to overcome these insecurities. Are you ready to live your life? Are you ready to take control of your life? Well, I am. So these are the things I suggest we do.

1. Stop worrying.
2. Stop thinking about these insecurities.
3. Don't let these insecurities be the reason why you don't enjoy all the great things life has to offer.
4. Go out often.
5. Laugh more.
6. Grow your faith.

Everything above is self explanatory and yes, I have decided to heed my own advice. I can't stay locked up in my tower for fear of what people will think of my condition and neither should you. I may not be able to snag the man of my dreams because of how I look and feel but I will try to enjoy life for what it is. And, indeed everyday is a reason to be happy. The key question really is, "are you willing to allow yourself be happy despite all that worries you?"

Let us go on this journey of self actualisation together. Take my hand. It is going to be alright. Trust me.

Xoxo,
The Lagos Rebel 😍

Hello world!!!

My blog! Finally!!!
You cannot begin to comprehend how exciting this is for me. Practically everyone had asked me to start up my own blog. Finally, after completing my service year and several attempts to get a job, I figured a blog wouldn't be so bad after all.

First, I want to thank my friends who have pushed me one way or the other. I want to thank Todun for this beautiful site logo (I still can't get over how beautiful it is). I want to thank my day one friend, Motun for the endless support she has rendered in the course of starting this project. To Dankaro, kuebano, Nwando, Nasa and those I can't remember, I want to say a big thank you.

This blog is going to act as a chronicle of my life henceforth. It's funny that I was born and bred in Lagos state but cannot actually name 5 places comfortably. Don't get me wrong, I am a very social person but I just don't go out in Lagos. It doesn't help that I didn't school in this city. Well, with this blog as motive, I plan to explore the city of lagos and share excerpts of my experience with you guys. I will be visiting hotels, bars, restaurants, beaches and pretty much every where I can afford.

I will also be sharing details of my life as well as gossip and fashion tips. I am too excited, can you feel it?
Hello REBELS, I am Jacinta the lagos rebel and I am excited to meet you too.